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Contributions start below. The following contribution was added on the 23rd May 2003 The Social Services System we have in the UK for the protection of children is a deadly combination of incompetence, indifference, intolerance, deceit and lies.  This system is, in its present form, one of the most destructive man-made forces Britain has ever known and is a major threat to family life, discipline and all that we hold dear to our hearts. History has shown, time and time again, that once the British public is made aware of a pending disaster, it acts to protect itself.  I therefore, call upon everybody who has the means to communicate (journalists, writers, church leaders, lecturers and public speakers, etc., etc,) to make a SPECIAL EFFORT to tell the people what damage is being caused by the Government and if it is to continue, explain how that damage will cause the eventual destruction of civilized society as we once knew it. Family Court Hearings are done in secret behind closed doors, no Newspapers allowed, and no support from family or friends of the parents involved.  In-fact the parents are under threat of imprisonment if they discuss the proceedings, or show any of the paperwork outside of the Secret Court System.  For as long as this remains the case, Social Services have the Power to Destroy any Family purely on the grounds of conflict of personalities! Since our introduction to Lymington Social Services back in July 2000 we have had to endure Professional Misconduct, Unethical Behaviour, Hostility, Lies, Deceit, Discrimination, Insults, Accusations, Humiliation, Misrepresentation, Misinterpretation, False Allegations and shown nothing but a complete Disrespect for our Integrities thoughts and feelings!  Not to mention being Falsely Accused of Unspeakable Acts of Indecency with our Children! Social Services take your children away, and then they interrogate every detail of your life in order to dig up something to justify them having taken the children.  They take innocent comments and petty things and turn them into something that is apparently damaging to children, all of which adds to them achieving their goal, which is to keep the children, and to eventually adopt them out!  I have as yet to hear of a case where Social Services has been involved with a family where they have not relied heavily on fabrication in order to build their case! They know how the law works, they know what a Judge is going to want to hear, and they know what to say to Outside Professionals like Psychiatrists and Psychologists and other Professional people usually involved in these cases.  They Fabricate Evidence to their advantage to achieve this!  It's amazing how many un-professional people like Play Group Assistants and the like, come out of the closet to take up sides against the parents, once they have been contacted by a Social Worker, sometimes this involves promotion as an incentive (e.g. Going from working in a Play Group, to working in a School). It now appears to be standard practice for Social Services to Falsely Accuse the Father or Man of the house of some Sexual Indiscretion with or in front of his children.  This will result in a Police Investigation, and give Social Services more time to build up their case against the parents.  However, even when the Police 'drop the charges' due to 'lack of evidence' to support them, the Social Services carry on with their own thoughts and beliefs and continue to 'trawl for evidence' in the hope of an eventual conviction!  However the Stigma would have already set in by now, and all reports from this point on would be bias! We are all for protecting children, but Social Services are destroying innocent families in order to get some Street Cred for the want of other words.  If you were out and about and someone insulted you out of the blue, then you would deal with the situation by either ignoring them, or challenging them as to why they said what they did.  However, you only have to say to a Social Worker that you are weary of their reputation, and within a week you will find your children gone, and you arrested.  This is exactly what happened to us, and left us thinking why should this be considered acceptable behaviour? My wife is registered blind, and I am her registered carer.  Up until two years ago we had three beautiful daughters.  We asked our Health Visitor to put us into contact with a Behavioural Therapist to help solve a problem we were having with our middle child, and because I mentioned to this woman that we were weary of asking for help from  Social Services due to the 'fear of their reputation', we lost out family!  We asked to see a Behaviour Therapist; instead we got a Social Worker pretending to be a Behaviour Therapist (The lies have started)!   Social Services are now putting our children up for adoption against are wishes.  They claim we neglected our children, but this was never the case.  Our Health Visitor and local GP Practice is 100% behind us in saying that there was never any neglect of the children in our house, and that if Social Services are saying that, they are doing so in order to justify themselves.  It was our GP suggestion that we write to the papers! We have spoke to our local MP, and he has been on to the Ombudsman and the Director of Social Services.  The Ombudsman replied that it was in the hands of the court, and therefore there was nothing he could do, The MP said he was lied to by the Director of Social Services.  In the hands of the courts is something you hear regularly stated when up against the local authority!   They have had both the wife and myself arrested for Cruelty, Neglect, Abandonment, ill treatment and physical abuse, the police dropped the charges after about three months.  This was three months though that Social Service felt justified in not working with us to return the children.  Again, later into the case, I was arrested again, along with some friends, this time on paedophile related charges.  They had already taken my computer away, and checked it over (and damaged it), and found nothing inappropriate.  Again, all charges were dropped about two months later!  Why is it, that after serious investigation the police can find no evidence to support these charges, the Social Services can carry on regardless?  I understand the need to investigate these things, but Social Services are using the Police; and dragging the reputation of the police down to their level! Social Services claim they are thinking of the children, thinking of their own reputation and adoption figures more like!  They use the children as a weapon against the parents.  They try and turn the children against their family, especially the father, this is known as 'Parental Alienation' and is considered Emotional Abuse!  As parents we are not allowed to talk about the case or what is going to happen to the children, and yet, Social Services do so openly, and then try and throw the blame of the children being to well informed onto the father of the children, claiming that he tells the children what is going on, and what the Social Services are doing behind the scenes.   All the books and things that we have read on the Internet and in the local library say that Foster Parents should work closely with the parents in order to keep close family ties.  This is not the case for local authority employed Foster Carer's; they work as spies for the Social Worker in the case.  They question the children when they return from a contact, and are forever listening out for anything that they feel would be of use to the Social Worker to use against the parents!  The Local Authority will of course deny this! They also spoil the children rotten, regular trips to Mc Donald's, and to the Fun Fair in order to impress on the children that they would be better off with different parents! Foster carer's work closely with the Social Worker in the case to set up little scenarios for contact situations, or for when the children are about to be interviewed by someone like the Guardian ad Litum or the Police!  So the Guardian and other professionals can then say, "Oh, but the children told me so."  We know this to be true, because the children have told us so, and we have seen it for ourselves, and yet Social Services adamantly deny this!  As any family that has been or is going through the same as us, and they will say the same as we are, these things do go on, no-matter how much The Local Authority deny it! Social Services and The Guardian ad Litum claim they listen to the children, but in reality they only hear what they want to hear, and not what the children are trying to get over.  If the child is trying to express her wishes to come home it's ignored, and then palmed off with excuses like, they don't really understand, there not old enough to know what is going on!  They excel themselves on putting the children and parents into these situations, with little understanding or care for the fact of the stress and pressure the children and parents are going to be under, and the fact that this alone is going to make it hard for either the children or the parents to express themselves in a way that can't be misinterpreted! We were told that the Guardian ad Litum was an independent, as were other professionals involved in the case.  However, anyone that has been on the receiving end of Social Services will tell you, they are not independent!  Social Services fabricate statements in order to give these so-called independents something to work with, usually to their favour, and not the family involved.  Of course, as with us, most parents believing that these people are independent, tend to open up a bit, little realizing the information that these people have already been supplied with.  This inevitably ends up with the so-called independent taking the side of Social Services.  Who then, when you argue that they are not being fair, claim that it's not their decision but that of the Professionals?  They then hide behind the Professionals, once a Judge has made a decision in their favour, they hide behind the Judges decision and so on.  They start the ball rolling with their lies, then stand back and watch it cascade out of control, claiming their innocence!  This is the action of Cowards, not a Professional Body of People that are there supposedly there to protect our children, where in actually fact, they are causing more damage to children than any one family could. Within a normal family you would have two fully functioning parents, in our family one of the parents was disabled and the other had to be registered as a Carer, and therefore not only had to look after his wife, but the children as well.  This would have been the ideal set-up for Social Services to become involved with the family and work with the family as they are supposed to do.  This would have given the Social Services the opportunity to prove that they are a caring organization and that the stories about them are unjustified, but rather than take that opportunity, they chose to live up to it! The Guardian that was called on to do a report on us has been dismissed from being a Guardian for some reason.  Her dismissal came about from her working on another case.  It may have been that the parents in that case claimed the same as us about the Guardian, in that she wasn't being strictly honest and that she was all to easily taking the side of The Local Authority, only in this case, maybe the parents knew someone in a position to do something about the situation, hence her dismissal! Also the main CID Woman involved at the beginning of our case has apparently been seriously reprimanded!  Given these two incidences, there must be grounds somewhere to get the case re-heard, or in other words, give the parents the chance of a re-trial! We were told we would have our day in court, in-fact nine and a half days; we spent the whole time defending ourselves against the false allegations that they were throwing at us.  The Judge kept falling asleep during the proceedings, probably due to her being well over retirement age.  Social Services were claiming that they had worked with us, by this they meant they had offered home help, we queried what it was, and this was taken as a refusal on our part!   It was said in court by The Local Authorities Barrister that it was never the intention of Social Services to not return these children to their rightful place with their family!  I replied to this by saying where in all the paperwork that has been generated by Social Services does it say that or show any evidence to the fact that the local authority has tried to work with us, because it doesn't.  Any person outside of this case that was to read for themselves the paperwork would clearly see that Social Services have not worked with us as a family, and have gone out of their way to look after their own interests, and not that of the family involved!  It has been the intention of the Social Services to adopt these children from the moment they were stolen from us! There are no positive comments in any of their paperwork about the father of the family, and yet we are talking about a man that has given up his weekly job and swapped it for a job that is 24/7.  A man that doesn't drink or partake in the use of recreational drugs or have any history of violence, or have anything to do with anyone that does!  A man that has found himself in the position of having very little time for himself, what with having to switch between being a Carer and being a Father.  A man that when he does get five minutes to himself  chooses to play a computer game for relaxation, is then accused of living in a 'Fantasy World!' This very same man has an exceptional reputation within the community, what with doing 'Voluntary Driving' for charities such as Age Concern, Arthritis Care and Greyfriers Community Centre.  He is loved and respected by the elderly community in the town where he lives, the very same elderly people that have met this man's children, and have found them to be 'very well spoken, polite and courteous' and a breath of fresh air in comparison to the way some parents bring their children up nowadays!   Our children are now living with potential adoptive parents, the next time we hear from Social Services will be when they take us to court for a Freeing Order and try to prove that we have been unreasonable, we have not seen our children since February 02.  This puts The Local Authority in the position of being able to say that the children are happy and settled where they are, and that the parents are not thinking of the children but only of their own wishes!  This is something that is done all the time in these sort or hearings!  The children should not have been removed from the family home in the first place, and being that they were, there were no grounds for these children not to be returned to their rightful place!   With the right kind of help, this could be averted; we could get our children back and get on with our lives! This will only happen though, if Social Services are exposed for what they are doing to innocent families, and the way they are doing it!  We all hear about the horror stories where Social Services haven't been doing their job properly, and it's a hard job, I wouldn't envy it.  However, there are Social Workers out there, that are abusing the system for their own needs, this has to stop!  The Social Worker in our case told the children's Grandmother that Social Workers were like Gods, they have all the power, and there is nothing you can do about it! Back in February 02 we were expected to say goodbye to our children in a contact we refused too!  Our children were then told by the Social Worker that going home to your parents is not an option!  We are now being told that the children like it where they are and are settled, but then the children have not been asked if they would be interested in going home to their parents if were possible.  It's all very well claiming that the children are saying they are happy where they are, but for a year and a half, the children were saying they wanted to go home to their mummy and daddy, this was ignored by the very people that are supposed to listen to the children! We have systematically gone through every bit of paperwork that we have access too.  At no point are their any positive comments about the Father; no mention of any Social Worker sitting down with the parents and talking to them about what The Local Authority had a problem with as regards their parenting, or any genuine offers of useful help to the parents!  If one was to read the paperwork for themselves they would see at all the different stages and tactics that The Local Authority have employed at any one time!  They would see for themselves were a Social Worker or Professional have latched onto something insignificant and turned it into something that should be in a 'Steven King Novel!'  They would see lies, they would see un-professional people making comments that the Social Worker then considers to be fact, for instance, the foster mother will tell the Social Worker something that she overheard the children talking about, the Social Worker then treats this information as a fact!  Even if it was complete fabrication in the first place!  One has to bear in mind that it is in the foster mother's best interests to keep the children in her care for as long as humanly possible, and by whatever means for 'financial gain'! I am aware that it is an offence to show any Care Proceeding Paperwork to anyone not Directly Involved in the case, however; If I have to spend a period of time at Her Majesty Pleasure in order to get attention drawn to our case, and many others like it, Then So Be It!   THIS IS HAPPENING TO FAMILIES ALL ACROSS THE UK!  THERE ARE FATHERS (EVEN AS I TYPE THIS) LOCKED UP IN 'PRISON' DUE TO THE 'FALSE ALLEGATIONS' BY SOCIAL SERVICES! WHEN IS IT GOING TO STOP? WE WANT OUR FAMILY BACK AS IT WAS (OR AT LEAST AS CLOSE AS TO WHAT IT WAS BEFORE THE 'CARE DAMAGE' THAT THE CHILDREN HAVE HAD TO ENDURE SET IN), AND WE NEED HELP FOR THAT TO HAPPEN!   DO YOU HAVE WHAT IT TAKES TO MAKE A STAND AGAINST THESE BUREAUCRATS, OR ARE YOU GOING TO BE AS GUILTY AS THEM (BECAUSE IT'S NOT YOUR FAMILY) FOR PROTECTING YOUR OWN BEST INTERESTS? THE TRUTH WILL COME OUT SOMEWHERE ALONG THE LINE, IT'S HAPPENING TO OFTEN AND TO TOO MANY FAMILIES! We have already lost our rights to be parents because of these people, but it's not as simple as that, we have lost our rights to have another child or to be grandparents even!  My wife has been on RNIB training courses since this has happened, but is now feeling that she has wasted her time!  I feel that I have aged before time, and my parents have become quite ill because of all this!  Why, what have we done that is so wrong? (1)       Neither parent drinks alcohol! (2)       Neither parent partakes in the use of illegal substances! (3)       Neither parent at anytime has ever exposed any of the children to anything sexually inappropriate! It all boils down to the Social Services not liking the Father because of the way he talks or dresses; surely this isn't grounds to destroy a family? They claim I will not work with them because of my beliefs about them, but in actual fact, we have both done everything that has been asked of us, and it is them that are guilty of not having worked with the parents, and their own reports prove it beyond any doubt! Social Services claim that my thoughts about them are false, but then how come every time I meet someone else going through the same sort of things I can tell them in advance the sort of things they can expect to happen, and I am right every time?  I should not be at fault for becoming a bit of a realist for the way I have been treated!  I was in a position where I was expected to do a lot more than the average Father, but I don't get any credit for what I did.  Instead I get insults and am made to feel lower than that stain that you get on carpet after you have cleaned up afters a pets accident!  Social Services have done nothing but undermine the parents, claiming that the parents are undermining their efforts to see the children all right.  When in reality, if you undermine the parents you are going to undermine their ability to parent a conundrum The Local Authority specialize in! There is now a new Guardian ad Litum on the case, and because the children have been living with potential adopters for the past year, she is claiming that the children are happy and settles where they are.  This may be true, but the children should not have been put in this position in the first place! We have been told by our solicitor that because the judge has made a judgement all The Local Authority reports are now considered fact!  So in other words, they have got away with all their lies and misinterpretations!  So if their reports are fact, then how come: (1) They claim to have worked closely with us!  Yet there is no evidence backing this claim in any of their paperwork or reports! (2) They claim there are positive comments about the father in their reports!  And yet with close scrutiny of the reports, none can be found! (3) They claim to be thinking of the Children's best interests!  Yet they have chosen to ignore anything the Children have said that is likely to prove positive to the parents!   HOWEVER THEY ARE QUICK ENOUGH TO LISTEN TO THE CHILDREN WHEN THE CHILDREN ARE SAYING SOMETHING THEY WANT TO HEAR! (4) They claim that the Sexual Allegation have nothing to do with our not getting the Children back, as they haven't found any evidence to support their claims!  Yet their reports are full of 'Unproved Allegation, and this hasn't stopped them from trying to get other professionals on side! (5) They now claim that the Children can not be returned home due to the professionals reports (Psychiatrists and Psychologists etc)!  This would be down to them having insisted that these professionals take into consideration their beliefs on the possibility of Sexual Abuse having occurred!  Even with no 'CONCRETE EVIDENCE' to support their beliefs! THIS PUTS THESE PROFESSIONALS IN A DIFFICULT POSITION!  IN ORDER TO PROTECT THEIR PROFESSIONAL STATUS THEY CANNOT AFFORD TO RULE OUT THE POSSIBILITY OF SEXUAL ABUSE, AND THEREFORE TEND TO LEAVE THINGS OPEN ENDED WITH COMMENTS SUCH AS, WE CANNOT DISMISS THE POSSIBILITY! THE DOCTOR INVOLVED WITH DOING A SEXUAL EXAMINATION OF ALL THREE CHILDREN WAS SUPPLIED WITH TWELVE REPORTS BY THE LOCAL AUTHORITY PRIOR TO HER DOING HER EXAMINATION.  This resulted in her claiming that she was un-able to dismiss 'Digital (fingers) Penetration!   WHEN OUTSIDE PROFESSIONALS MAKE STATEMENTS SUCH AS THE ABOVE, IT GIVES THE SOCIAL SERVICES THE ABILITY TO MAKE WHAT THEY WANT OF IT, BECAUSE IT DOESN'T PROVE ANYTHING EITHER WAY! (6) They are now claming that the Children are happy where they are, and that they don't want to come home or have any connection with the parents!  It is known fact that Social Services attempt to 'Brain Wash' Children to their way of thinking! They have had plenty of opportunity, as the children have not seen their parents since February 02, and therefore the children have not had the chance to talk with the parents!  Prior to that date, the children were seeing their parents in supervised contact, and it was obvious even back then that the 'Brain Washing' tactics had already been brought into play! Back then however, our eldest daughter wasn't having any of it, and would say so quite loudly in a contact!  In fact, in the very last contact in front of the Social Worker and the Guardian (that was dismissed) she said, "We like it where we are, but we would much rather be at home where we belong!"  However when this incident was mentioned in court, it was denied by the Guardian that it had ever happened! WHY IS IT THEY ARE NOW LISTENING CLOSELY TO WHAT THE CHILDREN ARE SUPPOSEDLY SAYING, WHEN THEY HAVEN'T BOTHERED PREVIOUSLY CLAMING THAT THE CHILDREN ARE NOT OF AN AGE WHERE THEY WOULD UNDERSTAND WHAT WAS HAPPENING TO THEM? (7) They claimed in court in front of the judge, that it was never their intentions to not return these Children to their 'Family Home!'  Yet their own paperwork tells a different 'Story', because there isn't a hint or suggestion in any of their reports that would back this claim up!  This was said in front of the judge to impress on her that The Local Authority have been doing their job correctly, and have been looking at all possible avenues and outcomes! (8) They claim, and have told others, that we have been dealt with in an 'Open and Honest' manner!  We feel that they have no concept of the meanings of these words!   The day after the Children were taken we turned up at their offices and asked to speak to a Mr Stuart Ashley who was their Team Leader!  We explained to him what we understood of the reasons why the Children had been taken, and asked his professional advice as to the best way to go about getting out Children back.  He lied to us!  Claiming that his department wasn't even aware of us, or the fact that we had Children, until such time the police notified The Local Authority of their concerns. Strange isn't it?  Considering we have access to 2 Planning Meeting reports (Which they're not aware of) done prior to them turning up on the day, where Mr Stuart Ashley quotes that it is 'his' belief that the Children may have been exposed to Sexual Abuse by the father! THIS IS JUST ONE OF THE MANY LIES THAT WE CAN PRODUCE EVIDENCE OF! We have now been told by our solicitor that even if we could prove everything that we have said as regards the way we have been treated by The Local Authority (Hampshire County Council) it would not do us any good, even if they have committed perjury!   He says that they will claim that the Children are happy and settled with the adoptive family, and that this is what the judge will go by! WHY SHOULD THIS BE? There has to be an invasion of our 'Human Rights' somewhere along the lines, there is no way these so called professionals should be able to get away with this kind of behaviour!   If the judge goes in their favour, then he is going to condemn every other family in this country, by condoning their behaviour! The Social Services have worked closely with all 'Foster Families' involved in this case, and they are now working closely with the Adoptive Family, why can they not be ordered to give us our Children back and work closely with us, like they were supposed to do in the first place! IT SHOULD BE SAID, THAT THE NEW GUARDIAN IS DISGUSTED WITH THE LENGTH TIME OF TIME THAT THIS CASE HAS BEEN GOING ON, BUT SHE ACCEPTS THAT IT'S THROUGH NO FAULT OF OURS! WE ARE BEING TOLD BY PROFESSIONALS AND FRIENDS THAT ARE STANDING BY US, NOT TO GIVE UP, BUT AS HARD AS WE TRY, IT'S NOT EASY KEEPING GOING AND OUR HEALTH IS STARTING TO SUFFER! THESE PROFESSIONALS AND FRIENDS ARE TELLING US THAT SOMEONE SOMEWHERE WILL TAKE HEART WITH OUR SITUATION, AND THIS IN TURN WILL CHANGE THINGS ROUND FOR US, BUT UNLESS THAT SOMEONE IS IN THE GOVERNMENT AND HAS SOME KIND OF CLOUT, WE DON'T HOLD OUT TO MUCH HOPE! SOMEONE PLEASE SEE WHAT IS HAPPENING TO FAMILIES IN THIS COUNTRY, AND PUT A STOP TO IT BEFORE IT'S TO LATE   xrs@nildram.co.uk xrs@v21mail.co.uk xrsmaynard@hotmail.com

Authors comment on this story:- Social workers, don't you just love them. If there was ever a group of people who needed rounding up, placing in a boat, taken out to the middle of the Atlantic and DROWNED, then they are it. No, seriously, there are undoubtedly times when they do a good job, but just TO MANY when they cock up then hide behind feeble excuses like "no resources available, no budget remaining, just following protocol" and many more.  It is on these occasions, when they make the very people they should be helping feel like social pariahs, and end up doing more harm than good, that one has to question just what is their role in life, and decorating the seabed seems to be a pretty good idea for those who's lives they have ruined.

As with all contributed content on this site,  I am  neither able to prove nor disprove the story given above, and rely instead on the honesty of the contributor. While I may have commented on this story, it in no way implies that I am in agreement with it, but simply that I have allowed the contributor the use of a "sounding board" to tell his/her story.

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